It’s finally happening.

The long-awaited. The official.
The sexy beast,

That shit goes live at 10 AM EST on Thursday, September 15th. Imagine myself and my extremely loyal web developer-friend Thomas (who built this behemoth) hunkered in a cinder block bunker somewhere gleefully pushing a big red button. Exactly the sort of big red button you’d push to unleash a warhead full of joyous f-bombs on the world. Yeah. Like that.

And to celebrate, and to say THANK YOU, fuckers, you’ll be able to get SIXTY PERCENT OFF (the new webstore, not the Etsy shop!) with code LAUNCH. On launch day. Until midnight. Like you do.

Seriously. THANK YOU. It’s trippy that Badgerface will be turning two years old (on November 20th, in case you want to blow a noisemaker or something) and we’re already kicking this much ass. But really, a company is only as awesome as its supporters, so, props to my Badgerbitches for the Facebook love, the Instagram love, the Twitter love. And the motherfucking craploads of orders.

Coffee Lip Balm
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Festive as Fuck
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Chai Lip Balm
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Fresh Fall Fuckery

We’ve also been busy whipping out some fall stuff. Some festive shit, ok? An obvious first place to start is with the lip balms, so we got those in the bag: cranberry ginger, chai, java, pumpkin spice. But we’ve also got a new coffee body scrub we’re excited about, and a mocha body butter (made with real unrefined natural cocoa butter) is also in the works.

And Christmas! Holy shit, Christmas! I’m envisioning some salacious new gift box labels along the lines of Merry Fucking Christmas and Jingle My Bells. If you’ve got an idea for a funny Christmas (or Hanukkah)-themed gift box label, take to Facebook with that shiz. If I use your idea, I’ll send you a coupon.

But really, save your money. Wait until the new site launches on September 15th and


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